Gone But Not Forgotten

I found myself in a funk after my second volleyball game tonight, I wasn't sure what caused it really but when I got home it hit me. My Grandma Bauman has been gone for four years, four years yesterday in fact. Grandparents are different to everyone. Some people aren't close with their grandparents, maybe they see them just once or twice a year, this is not the case with me. My grandparents were/are an integral part of my life, they helped raise me and have provided me with some of the best memories I have. I am named after my gram, Charlotte LaVonne while my sister Jill is after my other gram Mary Louise. My sis and I have a big family on the Toyne side but we were the only grandkids on the Bauman side, so we were extra special. My Grandma Bauman and I didn't always see eye to eye, but now I know it's because she always wanted the best for me, she always wanted me to be better, and I will always love her for that.

My grandma's passing was the first death I've really had to go through start to finish. I got a call from my parents on a Monday, they were in Indianapolis and told me that gram had fallen and was in the hospital, this had been my dad's biggest fear for years. I left work grabbed some roses and got home just about the time my parents did. I sat with my grandma in the hospital as the doctor told my parents that she had broken her hip and needed to be transferred to Fort Dodge for surgery. My parents and my aunt and I followed the ambulance to Ft. Dodge and my mom stayed the night with her while my Dad and aunt and I came back home. I'll never forget that next morning. My mom called me and told me I needed to get to the hospital ASAP, she let me know that things were bad. I drove the 45 miles in probably half and hour and when I got there my mom told me that during the night gram lost her kidney function. We all thought it was only a matter of hours before we would lose her. I held my grandma's hand and told her I loved her and we all waited ... and waited ... and waited. Soon my gram slipped out of consciousness and the next 3 days we all spent on the floor of the hospital. My gram was a fighter, what usually took hours took days. As Thursday approached I told everyone that we needed to go home. We needed showers, we needed a break, so that's what we did, and when we left so did my gram. It's so strange how that happens, I think she just wanted to be alone. My parents arrived just before she passed and when I got back I found my gram holding the roses I had brought her, I kept those roses for a long time. It was 2 days before my 21st birthday and we had her visitation on her birthday, the 14th. Sometimes I still can't believe she's gone, and I still can't believe it was because of a broken hip, I didn't think people died from that.

My gram was a great woman though and that I will always remember. Here are some other great memories I have with her.... you will see where I get my boldness ;)

- On my hair ..."Leslie, do you use a lot of cream rinse? Because your hair looks a little greasy."

- On my piercings ... "All those holes make you look trampy"

- She was an artist, and I was always drawing at her house. I think she got me started.

- She played in the Girls State Basketball Tournament when she was in high school, and when I got my first hoop she decided to show me how to shoot a lay-up with a hook, it didn't get anywhere near the net, she was convinced they raised the hoop since she played.

- She had a huge 1980-something Oldsmobile 88 and when I turned 14 and got my driver's permit my friend Ashley and I would hop in the front seat with her and drive her all over, especially to Lohrville to the Red Top for ice cream. Ashley and I would also dress up in her old clothes and act like old women with her, and I am pretty sure we made spaghetti once at my house and packed it up on our bikes and took it to her for lunch. I think Ash and I spent an entire summer with her around age 14.

- But most of all she was a phenomenal quilter. I don't hardly remember a time I wasn't at her house with that big hoop over her lap. She did everything by hand, none of that machine stuff. My aunt made her a book with all of the quilts she had done, I think that there are something like 50+ out there floating around.

There will always be a special place in my heart for my Gram. I hope she knows how much I loved her. Rest In Peace Gram, I'll never forget you!